| Speaking as a single woman my sister/friend said | | | | great car, on and on...honey please, don't you see |
| to me the other day, "You know I have truly | | | | the men that step to you are in the same boat |
| learned to love myself; I have learned to be | | | | and some in the boat without a paddle? Yet they |
| happy with me!" A little surprised at her | | | | come as if they are riding a stallion with a sword |
| statement which at the time seemed to come | | | | and shield in hand only they don't come to rescue |
| out of the blue, as she continued on it became | | | | you, they come to be rescued. Why? Because |
| abundantly clear (and much to my pleasure I | | | | they see it all over you, the lack of love for you. |
| might add) that what she had to say held true for | | | | Who are you? what do you like to do? Have you |
| me as well. | | | | ever done these things? What makes you happy? |
| She began to speak about our daughters, | | | | What makes you sad? What are the rules? What |
| biological and otherwise, and how they seem to | | | | are the limits? |
| want so much to attach themselves to a man, | | | | Loving and being loved is a wonderful thing, it's |
| claim love, and start having babies. | | | | meant to be but I heard someone say that when |
| Even at an early age our young women seem to | | | | two half people come together they don't make |
| think that they should throw themselves on the | | | | a whole, they are just two half people together. |
| sword, their dreams and aspirations kicked to the | | | | The discovery of the whole woman that I am |
| curb when they come across a male figure, not | | | | today didn't by any means happen overnight. If |
| even necessarily a man, (and that's an entirely | | | | you recall I said my sista and I are 40 something, |
| different article) that pays the slightest bit of | | | | but you don't have to wait until you're 40 |
| attention to them. | | | | something, you can start today. |
| We talked about how at 40 something we know | | | | Spend time with you; ask yourself some |
| and are happy with who we are, we know what | | | | questions and if you can't answer them that's |
| we want out of life, we know exactly what we | | | | where you start to get to know the woman in |
| will and will not accept, and most of all we have | | | | you. |
| taken the opportunity to fall in love with us. Now | | | | We all have flaws, some big some small, some of |
| don't get me wrong, we are both very strong, | | | | us have both big and small but trust me so do |
| attractive, single black women that by no means | | | | men. They have the same insecurities and |
| plan on being single for all of our remaining days | | | | questions we do. Never allow someone to |
| but until "he" arrives, and comes correct, we have | | | | convince you that you don't deserve better, you |
| learned that before we can love someone else | | | | do! But you have to believe that you do. If you're |
| we must love who we are. | | | | fat and you don't like it, dislike it enough to do |
| On Saturday we had taken ourselves on a date, | | | | something about it. |
| a double date as a matter of fact. She took | | | | If you know that your reading is not up to par be |
| herself and I took myself. Full body massages, | | | | smart enough to admit that you need help |
| shopping, lunch and a movie sounds like a great | | | | learning to read better. Every library has, or can |
| date right? Would I expect that from a date? | | | | direct you to a literacy program to help you learn |
| Absolutely! | | | | to read better. |
| I look at women young and old that seems to | | | | Pretty. Well it starts on the inside; deal with your |
| have settled for less than they really want, or | | | | issues of hurt or shame, pains and problems. Get |
| deserve. Some man came along, played a mind | | | | help with that too if needed, but deal with it girl. |
| game, found a comfortable place where the | | | | As you begin to come to grips with it, you will |
| woman cares for them more than they care for | | | | stop allowing it to sit on your face as a mask of |
| themselves and sadly in some cases for their | | | | shame or hurt for all to see. |
| own children and they rest. What is that about? | | | | Get yourself up, fix yourself up and like it, NO, |
| How dare you put anyone before yourself and | | | | love it, love you for who you are and when you |
| the one you brought forth! You get less and give | | | | do, watch what happens. |
| more, and you will always get less and give more | | | | Remember that your time is not God's time and |
| because you have not fallen in love with you! | | | | everything that happens is for a reason. It's never |
| Well I have issues, I'm over weight, I'm not | | | | too late to learn. |
| pretty, I'm not smart, I don't have a good job, a | | | | |